If there’s a theme to this list of disappointments from the year just past, it’s that almost all of these ten movies were made by artists — actors, writers, directors, producers — who can do and have done better. Think of this list, then, as less of an excoriation for mistakes made and more of an encouragement for these talented individuals to do better next time. In alphabetical order:
“Chaos Walking” / “Cherry”
It’s great that Tom Holland gets to cap off 2021 on the high of “Spider-Man: No Way Home,” because this year saw him in two borderline-unwatchable films that were clearly intended to broaden the scope of his repertoire. No doubt future ventures will display the many facets of this skilled performer, but neither the muddled sci-fi adventure of “Chaos” nor the trite addiction drama “Cherry” did much to spotlight his abilities.
“Dear Evan Hansen”
This Tony-winning musical made the leap to the big screen in what might serve as a textbook example in how not to adapt a stage show. (For one thing, maybe don’t cast a late-twentysomething as your teenage lead, even when a performer as talented as Ben Platt originated the role.) In an unexpected twist, “Come From Away” — one of the shows that “Evan” beat out for that Tony — got a much lovelier film version this year than this uncomfortably awkward and frequently misbegotten adaptation.
“Don’t Look Up”
You might have to go as far back as 1957’s “The Story of Mankind” to find a cast this distinguished (Leonardo DiCaprio, Jennifer Lawrence, Meryl Streep, Cate Blanchett and Timothée Chalamet, to name just a few) floundering in material this terrible. Writer-director Adam McKay depicts humanity’s reaction to climate change (and science in general) as a bunch of dunderheads ignoring a comet that’s heading right at us, but even with the wealth of satirical possibilities, he bobbles every opportunity to be funny or incisive or insightful. That comet isn’t the film’s only dead weight.
“Here Today”
The crossgenerational pairing of Billy Crystal and Tiffany Haddish should have led to genuine comedic fireworks, but audiences were instead subjected to this damp squib, saddled with the mawkish sentimentality that seems to be Crystal’s catnip in the latter years of his career.
“The Hitman’s Wife‘s Bodyguard” / “Red Notice”
In the former, Ryan Reynolds, Salma Hayek and Samuel L. Jackson collect a paycheck, travel the globe and occasionally phone in some blandly generic quips while a bunch of stuff blows up; in the latter, Ryan Reynolds, Gal Gadot and Dwayne Johnson collect a paycheck, travel the globe and occasionally phone in some blandly generic quips while a bunch of stuff blows up.
“Karen”
Alongside “Don’t Look Up,” here’s another whiffed opportunity for some blistering satire about the world as we know it. Taryn Manning stars in “Karen” as a woman named Karen who’s a real Karen, terrorizing a Black couple that moves in next door to her upscale Atlanta suburban home, and that’s about the point where writer-director Coke Daniels runs out of ideas.
“Prisoners of the Ghostland”
The pairing of the always-game Nicolas Cage with always-outrageous Japanese filmmaker Sion Sono seemed like it would be a match made in gonzo-grindhouse heaven, but the results were muddled and, shockingly, dull.
“Space Jam: A New Legacy”
The old legacy was bad enough, but this sequel misuses not only the iconic Looney Tunes characters but also practically every other character owned by Warner Bros., up to and including Baby Jane Hudson, Space Ghost, Mad Max and the nuns from “The Devils.”
