In what has become an exceedingly rare occurrence, author Susan Orlean managed to unite a huge number of Twitter users Friday night in absolute delight with an extremely endearing, consistently hilarious drunken tweet storm venting her frustrations with life during the COVID-19 pandemic.
The “The Orchid Thief” author started the Twitter day expressing what no doubt a lot of her fans were feeling: “I am not someone who prays but I am going to change my ways and start praying for Ruth Bader Ginsburg. I mean, pray really, really hard.” Considering Ginsberg announced Friday morning that her cancer has returned, it’s understandable. Also understandable in that context is what came next.
“Drunk,” Orlean tweeted, followed by, “Thank you for your support duri t this difficult time all misspellings are mine totally.”
Orlean explained that she and her husband had walked over to their neighbors’ house to check out a newborn colt and drank some wine. What followed was a consistently entertaining trip into Orlean’s mind that, despite typos, was often beautifully written and tapped right into frustrations a lot of people are feeling right now. Some examples:
Thank you for your support duri t this difficult time all misspellings are mine totally
— Susan Orlean (@susanorlean) July 18, 2020
You’re welcome.
Ok a newborn colt rocks it totally and he thought my hand was his mom. It was not. He has tasted life’s infinite tragedy. As I mentioned Earlier I am inebriated
— Susan Orlean (@susanorlean) July 18, 2020
Perfection.
You guys. Do you tho k my neighbors think 🤔 I’m a. never mind I’m going f to bed
— Susan Orlean (@susanorlean) July 18, 2020
Don’t worry, we guarantee they don’t.
Maybe I am drinking too much during THE FUCKING PANDEMIC
— Susan Orlean (@susanorlean) July 18, 2020
Nope!
I’m falling down drunk. First time in ages. Where is my kitty? He is my drunk comfort animal.
— Susan Orlean (@susanorlean) July 18, 2020
We feel you.
I mean SERIOUSLY
— Susan Orlean (@susanorlean) July 18, 2020
We are. For real.
Don’t worry though, she found her cat:
Finally pic.twitter.com/ZoEI5ulP2S
— Susan Orlean (@susanorlean) July 18, 2020
But just in case you’re not sure, “I have SO NOT BEEN HACKED,” Orlean wrote. All hail the queen.
As we said, this absolutely delighted everyone who came across it. But don’t take our word for it, check out some of the reactions below:
We know, baby, and we love you. https://t.co/ML2sLh2M9m
— Soledad O'Brien (@soledadobrien) July 18, 2020
It turns out I would die for Susan Orlean? https://t.co/GA73v93r8j
— Jess Zimmerman (@j_zimms) July 18, 2020
https://twitter.com/kalebhorton/status/1284309201112559616
I guess nine months from now there will be thousands of Susan-Orlean-drunk-tweets babies
— Sandra Newman (@sannewman) July 18, 2020
The perfect COVID times novel has been written and it is Susan Orlean’s twitter feed right now. pic.twitter.com/3sP664dfhM
— Elyce Phillips (@ElycePhillips) July 18, 2020