During a hearing Tuesday, attorneys representing Donald Trump argued that U.S. Presidents effectively have the legal right to murder their political rivals. We wish we were joking, but we’re not. But on Tuesday’s “The Late Show,” Stephen Colbert managed to find a joke in this otherwise horrifying concept when he took the argument to its logical conclusion — that this would apply to all presidents, not just Trump.
In other words, Colbert noted during his monologue that by this logic, the current president, Joe Biden has the legal right to kill Donald Trump. Which as he put it “is a really weird position for your lawyer to take.”
Now, the background for Colbert’s joke is that Trump faces dozens of charges in multiple cases related to his attempts to overthrow the government in order to remain in power illegally after the 2020 election. And the strategy he’s settled on is to claim that a president has almost total legal immunity for any crimes committed while in office, the hope being that the courts will agree and throw all of these pending cases out.
And thus, during a hearing Tuesday in Washington, D.C. to consider these claims, the presiding judges pushed Trump’s legal team on the horrifying implications of the theory. Trump’s lawyers argued that it would only be legal to prosecute a former U.S. president for criminal actions is if that president was first convicted in an impeachment trial. When asked by a judge if this would be the case even if a president ordered SEAL Team Six to murder political opponents, Trump’s team said it would be.
After explaining the background to his audience, Colbert was suitably disturbed by the notion, which led him to his thought experiment.
“To recap, Trump’s lawyers are arguing that the president — who is currently Joe Biden — could order SEAL Team Six to assassinate his political rival — who is currently Donald Trump. That is a weird position. That is a really weird position for your lawyer to take,” Colbert joked.
At this, the broadcast switched to black and white so that Colbert resembled a lawyer in an old movie. “Your Honor, there is nothing in any law book to prevent you from taking that gavel right now and smashing my client’s skull like a Brazil nut,” Colbert said, in-character.
But this line of thinking got Colbert to consider some other implications, leading to a fun, but also unnerving joke.
“So to recap, or to re-recap, Trump and his lawyers are arguing that the President ought to be able to murder his political opponents and then cannot be prosecuted unless he gets impeached,” Colbert continued. “Our commander in chief has godlike powers over life and death as long as his party controls the Senate. And I just want to say: Please vote
“I just, I just say a lot of things about this guy and I want to live to see the next Avatar movie. Okay?” Colbert added.
Watch the whole monologue above now.
And for those wondering just what’s so dangerous about the Trump legal argument, note that it takes 2/3 of the Senate — or 65 senators — to convict a president in an impeachment trial. If it were a prerequisite for prosecuting criminal wrongdoing committed by a president, then it would effectively make them above the law.
It’s worth noting that according to the literal text of the constitution, impeachment is strictly a matter of removing a president from office and does not have anything to do with criminal proceedings.