“SNL” delivered the finale for its 45th season on Saturday night, and with it came a pretty solid political portion of Weekend Update. Hosts Michael Che and Colin Jost delivered some commentary about the week’s biggest topics, from how people in Donald Trump’s circle keep catching coronavirus, to the Ahmaud Arbery shooting, to the sexual misconduct allegations against Joe Biden.
“A personal valet who handles President Trump’s meals has tested positive for the coronavirus. The news was first reported on CNN while the anchors tried not to smile,” Jost said to kick off the segment. “Trump also traveled to Arizona to visit a factory making respirator masks and, you’re totally gonna believe this, he didn’t wear a mask. He did however wear goggles for some reason and I gotta say he looks… special. He looks like they talked him out of wearing a cape. I’m not saying that the virus started in a laboratory. But if it did, it was a guy who looked like this who snuck in at night to pet the bats.”
Jost pointed at the picture of Trump wearing goggles on screen during that last bit.
A bit later, Jost got to the Tara Reade situation.
“Tara Reade, the woman who has accused of Joe Biden of sexual assault, is calling on him to drop out of the race. Replied Biden: ‘Wait. I’m still in the race?’ I don’t know whether the allegations against Joe Biden are true, and I’m not sure Joe Biden does either,” Che joked. “He’d probably have an easier time remembering Tara Reade if her name was like, Waffle Fries Johnson.
“What I do know is that this is a really good argument for a female president. Like, you’ll never hear about Angela Merkel just grabbing some dude’s crotch. And if she did it would be with consent at a BDSM club in Dusseldorf.”
Che, as has been part of his bit every Weekend Update since the final in-studio “SNL” episode in March, again had a glass a liquor in his hand during the more serious portion of the segment.
“Look, obviously this pandemic has been tough for everybody. I lost my grandmother. Colin, you lost J Crew. Everything’s changing so fast, but like what if this is my last time on TV?” Che mused. “That sounds dramatic, but I got a whole summer to survive. I mean, not just the virus. I gotta worry about the police. I mean, you know 40 people were arrested in New York for not social distancing and 35 of them were black, four were Hispanic, and only one was white. I guess white people are harder to catch because they’re all greased up in sunscreen at Central Park, right Colin?”
“I’m not ready to joke about J Crew yet,” Jost replied.
Later, Che brought up the Ahmaud Arbery shooting as part of that same stream of consciousness.
“It’s just too much for me to worry about. You know two white men in Georgia shot a black man for jogging in their neighborhood, Colin. Jogging! Said he looked suspicious,” Che said. “Look, I don’t want to brag but I live in a very, very, very white neighborhood, and I spend so much of my time trying not to look suspicious to white neighbors. It’s exhausting.
“I don’t even feel comfortable wearing my mask in public because I feel like it’s entrapment. But even I can’t think of something less suspicious in a white neighborhood than jogging. Except maybe tinkering on a Trans Am, listening to White Snake, or walking a toddler on a leash. I mean, what else could we do?”
You can catch this part of Weekend Update from the season 45 finale of “SNL” in the video up at the top of this article.