With Donald Trump now selling Bibles, Seth Meyers has a guess at what the legally and financially troubled ex-president’s next piece of merch will be.
During Meyers’ “A Closer Look” segment on Wednesday’s “Late Night,” Meyers first made fun of the fact that Trump is selling Bibles at all, especially because his next criminal trial is about to begin.
“Yup! The guy who’s about to go on trial for paying hush money to cover up an affair with a porn star is selling Bibles,” Meyers sniped. “And, because it’s a Trump Bible, most of the Ten Commandments are blacked out.”
But on the whole, Meyers wasn’t surprised by Trump selling Bibles at all, considering the other pieces of merch he’s tried to push on people.
“Trump has already sold cologne, digital trading cards and golden shoes. Now he’s selling a Bible. What’s next?” Meyers asked. Of course, he had the answer all ready to go, putting on his Trump voice to begin a short infomercial.
“I’m proud to announce the Trump-approved God Bless the USA toilet plunger,” he joked. “As you can see, there’s a beautiful — there’s a beautiful white plastic handle. It comes with a solid gold bottom. You can see the bottom. You can’t see it, but I assure you it’s there.”
To prove it, Meyers-Trump offered a “quick peek” and held up the bottom of the plunger for a split second, which was indeed gold in color. To “prove” it was actually solid gold though, the host banged it on his desk, resulting in a delayed sound effect of metal clanging.
“Call now and buy the Patriot Plunger for the very reasonable price of $199,” Meyers continued. “You’ll get a free roll of MAGA toilet paper. It’s 45-ply in honor of me, your 45th favorite president. It’s like wiping your ass with a book, which I’ve done. Not gonna say which book, but let’s just say it’s my favorite one.”
You can watch Seth Meyers’ full “A Closer Look” segment in the video above.