Not So Wild About Wild Cards

The long awaited Wild Card round aired last night, with performances at the top and results at the end of the show – yes, including yet another “shocker.” Don’t you wish Hollywood Week had been this efficient?

The Performances:

Jesse Langseth kicked off the night with a sultry performance of “Tell Me Something Good.”  It was impressive at the time, but fast forward to three minutes later and I could remember neither what she sang nor her name.

Sporting a Justin Timberlake outfit and his old reliable “bluesy” persona, dueling piano player Matt Giraud redeemed himself from his previous “Coldplay” debacle.

Megan Corkrey talk-sang her way through “Black Horse and the Cherry Tree” while doing her signature crazy person twist.  The judges offered nothing but praise. Clearly, they were hitting the crack pipe. Corkrey tries to channel singers from a bygone era, but there is such affectation in her voice that she will be revealed as a fraud sooner or later.

Von Smith clearly paid attention in “Eye F—ing the Camera 101” at Idol University.  His vocals were strong, but the judges accused him of being boring.  Make up your mind, judges.  Before he was too flamboyant.  Now he’s too boring? Wear a hat, don’t wear a hat? Jeez.

The most memorable thing about Jasmine Murray’s performance was the fight that Paula and Simon got into while critiquing it.  Her belt was impressive and her rendition of “Reflection” was more age appropriate than past performances but, looks aside, there doesn’t seem to be anything distinctive about her.

It’s hard to believe that Ricky Bobby — oops, I mean Braddy — could hit all those high notes in those painted-on pants.  Perhaps it’s a testicle thing?  I’ll overlook the fact that he broke the unwritten rule of singing Stevie Wonder and just say that while he’s a talented singer, his lack of personality and face-time on episodes past left me saying, “Wait … who was that guy?”

Say what you will about Tatiana del Toro, the girl can sing (even though she’s sung the same song twice in a row). The fun of her is that you never know what you’re gonna get. While some things remain the same (the Paula Abdul QVC jewelry), others change (her new Spanish accent). Many abhor the drama but I say, “Viva Tatiana!”

Anoop Desai reprised his Hollywood Week song, “My Prerogative.”  The first time I thought he was trying to be ironic.  This time, it hit me that he might actually like the song.  Seriously? Either way, he gave an energetic performance and the audience (both in studio and at home) couldn’t get enough of him.

And the Winners Are …

It pays to be beautiful! Jasmine and her “commerciality” made it through.  Expect to see her get cut within the next three rounds, though — this is not “America’s Next Top Model.”

Megan Corkrey and Tatiana del Toro were called up together, and the judges chose the marketability of Corkrey over del Toro’s voice. (Did someone say “BS?”) Langseth, whom Simon said “nearly made it,” also fell victim to whatever spell Corkrey has cast over the judges.

The Anoop Troop was disappointed once again when Matt Giraud advanced instead. Desai was disappointed for about 2.5 seconds, but then Simon announced that this year there wasn’t a Top 12 but a Top 13!  Anoop’s results are always revealed in a “save the best for last” kind of fashion.  Hopefully that bodes well for his chances in the finals.

Yes, the Wild Card show was somewhat of a nail-biter, but was all the fanfare really necessary?  Clearly the judges either already knew who their four picks were or they decided hastily during the commercial break.  It was obvious that they had already chosen Corkrey.  What’s not clear is whether or not they had already decided to have 13 finalists instead of 12.  Pseudo-surprise or not, Anoop is in the finals and that’s good enough for me!

 

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