‘Monsters’: Were the Menendez Brothers Abused by Their Parents?

The truth behind this Netflix original is blurrier than you may realize

Monsters: The Lyle and Erik Menendez Story
Nicholas Chavez as Lyle Menendez, Cooper Koch as Erik Menendez in "Monsters: The Lyle and Erik Menendez Story" (Photo Credit: Netflix)

When Court TV first broadcast the Menendez case in 1993, the trial took America by storm. Now Netflix’s latest series from Ryan Murphy and Ian Brennan, “Monsters: The Lyle and Erik Menendez Story,” is diving into the divisive case.

Though the brothers originally said they were not responsible for the murders of their parents José and Mary Louise “Kitty” Menendez, since they’ve admitted to the crimes, they’ve stuck to the same defense. Lyle and Erik Menendez claim that both of their parents physically, emotionally and sexually abused them for years and that they were afraid their parents were going to kill them if they didn’t act first. That’s what led to them pulling shotguns on their parents in 1989.

From exactly what the brothers accused their parents of to the intimacy of Lyle and Erik’s own relationship, here’s what we know from the case.

Were the Menendez brothers abused by their parents?

Childhood abuse has always been paramount to the Menendez defense. Both brothers claimed that the sexual abuse started when they were six. It progressed the same way, starting with José giving them massages after their sporting games. Later, this progressed to their father inserting objects inside of them and eventually oral sex as well as rape. According to the brothers, José never said the encounters were homosexual, especially since he would often use homophobic slurs. Rather, he said this was a bonding exercise similar to what the ancient Spartans or Romans would do.

It wasn’t just limited to José. It was an open secret in the family that if José went into Erik’s room and closed the door, the two were not to be disturbed. It was also widely known that José would shower with his sons well into their teenage years.

The brothers claimed they told their mother what was happening but that she dismissed them. By their account, she also wasn’t blameless. Lyle said that until he was 13, Kitty still gave him baths. She would also bring him to bed with her and encourage him to fondle her. With Erik, she would inspect his genitals, looking for early signs of HIV.

Lyle claimed that José abused him from around the age of six until he was eight years old. Erik claimed his abuse lasted into adulthood, which is what prompted the brothers to take action against their parents. Shortly after Lyle learned that the abuse was still continuing and that Erik would be staying home for college, he confronted his parents. The brothers alleged that the severe aftermath of that confrontation was what led to them purchasing guns as a means of self-defense.

Were the Menendez brothers in love with each other?

Lyle Menendez did admit on the stand to sexually abusing his brother. He claimed he learned to do so from his father, whom the brothers claimed sexually abused them both starting when they were six. While he admitted this during the trial, Lyle barely held back tears as he apologized to Erik.

Aside from this disturbing revelation, the narrative that the brothers had an incestuous romantic relationship with one another is not a common narrative or even a common rumor.

In Robert Rand’s “The Menendez Murders: The Shocking Untold Story of the Menendez Family and the Killings that Stunned the Nation,” he details that one of Erik’s jurors during the first trial suggested the brothers were romantically involved. The juror proposed the theory that Erik and Lyle’s parents learned about their relationship, which was the real reason why the brothers killed their parents. To determine if this theory had any credibility, the jury asked for “all testimony or allusions to Erik’s homosexuality” to be read back by the court reporter. And because this trial was broadcast on Court TV, most of America knew that the brothers’ sexuality played a huge factor in at least one jury’s decision. The theory was ultimately thrown out, and both Erik and Lyle’s first trial ended in hung juries.

Many also noted that Lyle was protective of his younger brother. But other than those details, the implication that the two had a romantic relationship seems to be a work of fiction. It could also be the case that “Monsters” portrayed the brothers in this light to show how this family blended familial love with romantic intimacy, and to dramaticize the rumors that swirled around Lyle and Erik.

Erik Menendez’s sexuality

Before diving into this complex topic, it’s important to note that both brothers are currently married to women. Lyle first married Anna Eriksson before getting a divorce and marrying Rebecca Sneed in 2003. As for Erik, he married Tammi Saccoman in 1999.

Though Lyle’s sexuality was rarely questioned during the trials, Erik’s was. When he was on the stand during the first trial, Erik admitted he was “real confused” about his sexuality. This admission was connected to Erik detailing the sexual abuse he claims to have endured at the hands of his father. His mother’s demand he get a girlfriend was also part of the case. Kitty Menendez reportedly told Erik he had six months to find a young woman to date.

There were also rumors that Erik was having oral sex with inmates while in prison. In Robert Hofler’s “Money, Murder, and Dominick Dunne: A Life in Several Acts,” he wrote: ” ‘There was a strain of homosexuality running through the trial,’ said the prosecutor, Pamela Bozanich, whom Dunne quickly befriended. ‘We knew Erik was gay and having oral sex with the inmates.’ They also knew of homoerotic photographs taken of Erik.” 

That being said, Erik Menendez has always denied being gay. The defense repeatedly objected to any reference by the prosecution concerning Erik’s sexuality. They also objected to the insinuation that Erik was using details of his alleged homosexual lifestyle to guide his descriptions of the abuse he experienced at the hands of his father.

Despite the defense repeatedly trying to pull focus away from Erik’s sexuality, it became a big part of the first trial. The prosecution even argued that the big secret the Menendez family was hiding was Erik’s homosexuality rather than José’s sexual, physical and emotional abuse, as the defense argued. Many members of the jury have said they didn’t buy this particular claim by the defense.

“Monsters: The Lyle and Erik Menendez Story” is now streaming on Netflix.

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