I think it was Mark Twain who said, “If you don’t like the latest Guy Ritchie movie, just wait a few minutes.” Sure enough, there’s probably another one coming. The “Snatch” and “Man From U.N.C.L.E.” filmmaker has an uncanny ability to churn out spry ensemble action and/or crime movies about tough guys doing tough things while saying funny things. He’s done so many at this point, and releases them in such rapid succession, that his oeuvre looks a little bit like an assembly line.
That’s actually a compliment: Guy Ritchie has done the same thing so many times that, dang it, he’s got his formula down to a science. His latest, “The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare,” is a bracing and enjoyable men-on-a-mission thriller, based on a true story about a secret, clandestine mission to neutralize the threat of German U-boats in the early days of World War II, called “Operation Postmaster.”
“The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare” stars Henry Cavill as Gus March-Phillipps, who the film proudly claims was the real-life inspiration for James Bond. This marks the second Bond-type character Cavill has played in the last three months, after Matthew Vaughn’s “Argylle.” At the outset of Ritchie’s film, Gus meets with a man called “M” (Cary Elwes) as well as James Bond creator Ian Fleming (Freddie Fox) himself. Gus is cocky, snarky, flirtatious, and drinks expensive booze. If a conspiracy is underway to get Henry Cavill installed as the next 007, they’re not being sneaky about it.
Gus assembles a team of always-do-wells, including a roguish explosives expert (Henry Golding), a brilliant schemer (Alex Pettyfer), a loyal sailor (Hero Fiennes Tiffin) and a happy gay Jason Voorhees (Alan Ritchson). That last character, Andres Lassen, is a handsome and lovable goof who flirts with his fellow soldiers and mass murders like a slasher villain. He fires arrows through multiple Nazis at once. He rips out and collects their bloody hearts. And yet the only hearts that he has truly stolen… are ours.
Their mission is to sail to Fernando Po, a Spanish-controlled island off the coast of western Africa. There, they will sink a cargo ship carrying the German supply of carbon dioxide filters, without which the Nazi U-boats cannot dive underwater, minimizing their tactical threat. The catch is, it’s not an official government mission, so they’re in trouble if they run into the enemy, and they’re in trouble if they run into their own countrymen.
Meanwhile, two spies infiltrate Fernando Po and set up the daring raid. Mr. Heron (Babs Olusanmokun) installs himself as a casino owner with all the right connections, and Marjorie Stewart (Eiza González) masquerades as a gold dealer to get in close with Heinrich Luhr (Til Schweiger), the Nazi who runs everything on the island. As with all men-on-a-mission movies — good, bad or otherwise — the plan goes wrong multiple times, and our heroes have to improvise to save the day. If you’ve seen “The Dirty Dozen” or “The Guns of Navarone,” you know the basic drill.
But here’s the thing: Guy Ritchie loves basic drills. A notable subsection of his career is dedicated to applying his whimsically macho mannerisms to one British icon after another, like Sherlock Holmes and King Arthur. In “The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare” he’s got himself a twofer with Winston Churchill (Rory Kinnear) and, kinda, James Bond. It’s a larger than life World War II thriller in the Guy Ritchie house style, and he strikes a fine, fun balance between the threat that the Nazis posed and the thrill of watching hunky heroes slaughter them at great length, then chuckle and smoke cigarettes and call each other “old boy” about 50 million times.
Cavill, rocking a beautifully curly mustache, is clearly enjoying himself. “Reacher” star Alan Ritchson seems born to murder bad guys (on camera). The whole cast is having a wonderful time. It’s a hangout movie about taking down white supremacists, en masse and with violent glee. It’s hard not to get swept up in this film’s simple pleasures.
But the real star of “The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare” is the film’s composer, Christopher Benstead, whose music playfully evokes the energy and tone of Ennio Morricone, giving the film a charming “macaroni combat” vibe. In addition to sounding just delightful, Benstead’s score puts the film in a helpful context. This isn’t a serious World War II film, it’s a pulpy adventure that uses a real story as the foundation for pure sensationalism.
So you can take your subtlety and you can shove it. We’re supposed to enjoy this violence, drink in this slickness, laugh at this silliness, and shake our fists at the sniveling cowards who try to scuttle this mission and submit to Hitler. Screw those guys! They’re jerks! Hurray for our handsome heroes and their tireless commitment to killing evildoers! They may not be gentlemanly and/or scholarly, but they’re great at this whole warfare thing.
Lionsgate’s “The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare” opens exclusively in theaters on April 19.