Jimmy Kimmel was certain on Tuesday night that Kamala Harris won the debate earlier in the evening against Donald Trump.
“It was like watching the Lorax debate the Grinch tonight. Usually when Donald Trump gets a spanking like this from a woman it’s with a Forbes Magazine. Kamala was pushing his buttons like a 12-year-old playing ‘Fortnite,’” Kimmel joked during his monologue.
“Oh, this was a much better debate than the last debate,” he joked. “This is like ‘The Lion King’ when Simba came back to avenge Mufasa.”
“Trump’s advisors before the debate, they urged him to be ‘happy Trump’ instead of ‘mean, bully Trump,’ and to please focus on the issues. Of course he didn’t listen to any of that at all. But who are we kidding? This election isn’t about the issues,” Kimmel continued. “I mean, Dick Cheney isn’t voting for Kamala Harris because he agrees with her on the issues. He’s voting for her because there’s a rhinoceros charging, and she has the tranquilizer gun.”
Watch the monologue below:
Kimmel ran through some of the weird stuff Trump got up to before the debate, and he brought up the lies Republicans, including Trump and his running mate JD Vance, have been spreading — and which Trump repeated during the debate itself. Specifically the lie about Haitian immigrants, who Republicans are falsely saying are eating other people’s pets in Ohio.
“The city of Springfield, in [JD Vance’s] state, Ohio, says there have been no credible reports of Haitians eating pets. But JD Vance, who wants to be vice president of the United States, keeps bringing it up,” Kimmel continued, at which point he referenced claims Vance made that people called his office to report this behavior.
“Oh, he’s getting calls. I didn’t know he was getting calls, now it makes sense. I guess all you have to do to get JD Vance to start spreading crazy things around — is make calls.”
At this point, Kimmel displayed the phone number (202) 224-3353 onscreen.
“This, by the way, is the direct line to his office. Whatever you do, do not call that number to tell JD Vance that rainbow sprinkles at Baskin Robbins turned your kids gay, OK. Please, do not distract the senator with this kind of silliness.”
Kimmel then mentioned how Trump brought this racist lie up during the debate.
“Here’s what I’d like you to do right now. I want you to close your eyes. I want you to imagine we’d never heard of Donald Trump before, and the first time you ever seen him was during tonight’s debate. What would your reaction be right now? You’d be in shock. The Republican party would have to close their headquarters and turn them into a Spirit Halloween store,” Kimmel said.
Kimmel then mocked Trump’s assertion that “people on television” prove the racist lie about Haitian immigrants is true, adding commentary about how he also deliberately mispronounces Harris’ name. He also noted how Trump reacted when Project 2025 was mentioned during the debate.
“Oh, what a mess. Oh, what a job he did tonight,” Kimmel said as he got close to the end of the segment. “Joe Biden is going to be so happy when he wakes up tomorrow and watches this.”
Watch the full “Jimmy Kimmel Live” segment in the video above.
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