Stephen Colbert‘s NFL Championship Game coverage, which for legal purposes he’s calling “Superb Owl XLVIII,” rolled on Tuesday night.
The week-long celebration comes complete with an awesome opening graphic that contains dancing, owl-tossing and fire-breathing Colberts.
The mega sports fan is up in arms — and legs — over the NFL possibly eliminating both the extra point and kickoff from its game in the near future. The Comedy Central host has a serious problem with the proposal, for two reasons.
See video: Stephen Colbert Finds NFL Trademark Loophole: Prepare for ‘Colbert Report’ ‘Superb Owl XLVIII’
First, the semantic one: “How can you even call it ‘football’ if nobody touches the ball with their foot?” Colbert wondered aloud. And then the selfish one: “Most importantly, placekicker was the last position available to middle-aged, lumpy white guys.”
Still, there may be hope for the Colbert Report anchor’s dreams yet: Championship quarterback.
Colbert quipped: “I mean how hard could it be? You put your hands between some guy’s legs and scream? Welcome to my daily staff meeting.”
Watch the clip: