Aidy Bryant made her debut as an awards show host at the Film Independent Spirit Awards on Sunday, and she admitted in her opening monologue that she was a little nervous.
“I can only hope that in this single afternoon I will be panned, considered out of touch and sexist and potentially be slapped,” Bryant said.
The “Saturday Night Live” alum had a few riffs about indie cinema, an industry that is “the only place in America where $20 million is, like, no money.” She also noted how she became aware of many indie filmmakers because “my high school boyfriend talked about you all the time when we dry humped.”
“I’m married now, so I learn less about cinema, but for many years I was taught what a tracking shot was over and over by the boys who penetrated me,” Bryant joked. “And like much of the sex in independent cinema, it was sad, harshly lit, and central to the development of my character.”
After a few (intentionally) miserable attempts at nominee roasting — “Charles Melton, everyone wants to have sex with you, you stupid bitch!”— Bryant had some more pointed barbs related to last year’s strikes.
“If your acceptance speech goes long, instead of getting played off, you will automatically be 3D-scanned and placed in the background of ‘The Mandalorian,’” she warned. “And speaking of the strike, I have to ask: Is everyone getting coffee with the people you ran into on the picket line? You said you would!”
