Jimmy Kimmel didn’t buy Pete Hegseth’s attempt to deflect criticism of his actions by blaming the people who brought attention to his actions. And in his monologue on Tuesday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live,” he explained in slightly scatological terms.
Kimmel got to this as he transitioned from the topic of a search for a new Pope.
“So, we have a new Pope on the way, and maybe a new Secretary of Defense soon. If you see white smoke coming from the Pentagon – it means they fired Pete Hegseth,” Kimmel joked.
“Pete Hegseth is getting hammered,” Kimmel continued, “not the way he used to,” which of course is a reference to the multiple reports of Hegseth’s problem drinking, “this time he’s getting hammered over new bombshell revelations literally about bombshell revelations.”
Kimmel then reminded viewers of precisely what’s happening — that Hegseth is in the middle of yet another classified information scandal involving the encrypted communication app Signal.
“After The New York Times uncovered another unauthorized group chat, this one from his personal phone, in which he shared the secret and very sensitive details of a military strike, with his wife, his lawyer and his brother,” the ABC host said.
“His brother turns out is his senior adviser, in case, just in case you’re wondering, worried there was only one unqualified Hegseth running the military. There are two,” Kimmel joked.
“You know, my wife and my brother work with me, not once have I shared my secret war plans for Matt Damon. That’s between me and Guillermo Team 6,” Kimmel quipped. “We keep it, we keep it tight. But Pete Hegseth is not as tight-lipped, I guess.”
Kimmel then explained how what happened is that an Army general told Hegseth about plans for a surprise attack on Houthi rebels based in Yemen. And then Hegseth immediately started sharing that information with his wife and brothers and his lawyer, none of whom have clearance to view such information.
This is, to be clear, separate from the other Signal group that Hegseth was part of, where Jonah Goldberg of The Atlantic was invited to, in which the same classified information was illegally shared.
“And now he’s in a lot of trouble. So, he rushed back to his old stomping grounds. the friendly confines at Fox this morning to make his case,” Kimmel continued, explaining how Hegseth blamed whoever brought his actions to light, implying all sorts of conspiracy theories about them.
“It was bullshit from the beginning too,” Kimmel continued before pretending to address Hegseth personally. “You texted the exact time and place the secret bombing would begin before the secret bombing happened. To your wife on an easily hackable phone.”
“And his defense for this is, ‘who told you? And how dare they tell you?’ This is like your wife catching you in bed with another woman and your response is – ‘well, why did you come home so early?’ Our Secretary of Defense is defenseless,” Kimmel added.
“But it’s not his fault, the ones who get the blame for this, are the leakers,” Kimmel went on before addressing Hegseth again. “You don’t have, you don’t have time for leakers? You are the Leaker! You’re the one who leaked this! You leak so much – you should be wearing Depends to work!”
Watch the whole monologue below