Here we are, with “Spider-Man: Homecoming,” the first “Spider-Man” movie in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Let’s celebrate with a deep dive into the characters, and figuring out who’s the best in this new world of the Webslinger. Warning: some spoilers ahead.
18. Other Shocker (Logan Marshall Green)
Rule of thumb for being part of a criminal gang that sells comical alien tech: don’t threaten to blackmail the guy in charge.
17. Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.)
Just as bad of a dad as his own dad was. But probably funnier, I guess.
16. Mr. Harrington (Martin Starr)
Maybe the guy who doesn’t know the Washington Monument was built by slaves shouldn’t be in charge of the academic team.
15. Happy (Jon Favreau)
The absolute worst nanny ever.
14. Liz Allan (Laura Harrier)
Liz is just not enough of a nerd for Peter.
13. Aunt May (Marisa Tomei)
Aunt May may be hot now, but she’s still a total mom at heart. See: her joke about larb.
12. Coach Wilson (Hannibal Buress)
Everyone needed a Coach Wilson in high school — the kind of teacher who’s just like “hey don’t do that, that’s bad” but then doesn’t really pay attention to whether you listened.
11. Flash Thompson (Tony Rivelori)
The best kind of bully: one who has a thoroughly great time being mean.
10. The Tinkerer (Michael Chernus)
We should all approach our work with the sort of excitement that the Tinkerer feels while he’s soldering weird alien stuff together.
9. Betty Brant (Angourie Rice)
Betty is hilarious — but there’s not nearly enough of her. Remember, last year Angourie Rice was stealing scenes left and right from Ryan Gosling and Russell Crowe in “The Nice Guys.”
8. Karen (Jennifer Connelly)
Easily the best disembodied voice in the entire MCU.
7. The Shocker (Bokeem Woodbine)
Tough not to relate to the absolute glee he expresses while using outlandish alien weapons.
6. Ned (Jacob Batalon)
Spidey’s best friends does a lot of normal best friend things, like being extremely excited that Peter has spider powers and knows rich people like Tony Stark. Also they built a LEGO Death Star together.
5. Captain America (Chris Evans)
Look, if you have to watch dopey educational videos at school, you could not possibly do better than the ones Captain America does as an outstanding running gag in “Homecoming.”
4. Aaron Davis (Donald Glover)
Just wanting a gun to stick people up with rather than some crazy alien thing that would send them back in time gives Davis a weird sort of mundane nobility in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Also we like him because Donald Glover is good.
3. Peter Parker/Spider-Man (Tom Holland)
Not quite the wise-cracking Spidey we know best, but maybe this screen incarnation of Peter Parker is even better: wide-eyed, clever, and happy to be able to help wherever he can.
2. Vulture (Michael Keaton)
One of the best and most human villains in the MCU, pitting the bitterness of a Trump voter against the optimistic liberal ideals of Spider-Man. Keaton is an absolute marvel (no pun intended), managing to switch between charisma and an intense amount of menace at ease.
1. Michelle (Zendaya)
The totally chill, deadpan, inscrutable Michelle is just the best, especially in contrast to all the other kids being super talkative and neurotic.
