We’ll admit it: Donald Trump is extremely good at giving insulting nicknames to his enemies. Especially enemies who used to be friends, like former chief advisor Steve Bannon.
Bannon fell afoul of his former boss after excerpts from Michael Wolff’s book “Fire and Fury” quoted him at length dissing Trump and his family (including calling Donald Trump Jr.’s meeting with a Kremlin-connected Russian lawyer at Trump Tower in 2016 “treasonous”). Trump already said Bannon “not only lost his job, he lost his mind” after the comments went public. And late Thursday he went further, dismissing Wolff as a liar and granting Bannon a nickname he’s probably going to be stuck with for the next three years:
I authorized Zero access to White House (actually turned him down many times) for author of phony book! I never spoke to him for book. Full of lies, misrepresentations and sources that don’t exist. Look at this guy’s past and watch what happens to him and Sloppy Steve!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 5, 2018
Ouch.
Whether Bannon is wincing at the new nickname, social media had a field day. America, it seems, was united in at least one thing: agreement that it’s a pretty good insult.
First, a breakdown of where “Sloppy Steve” fits in Trump nickname history — like this Dramatis Personae, just in case you need it:
TRUMP NICKNAMES
Hillary Clinton – "Crooked Hillary"
Kim Jong Un – "Rocket Man"
Steve Bannon – "Sloppy Steve"
Elizabeth Warren – "Pocahontas"
Marco Rubio – "Little Marco"
Chuck Schumer – "Cryin' Chuck"
Jews – "Mother Fucking God Damn Dirty Jews"— Matt Oswalt (@MattOswaltVA) January 5, 2018
Or for the more savvy-minded, how “Sloppy Steve” compares to classics like “Crooked Hillary” and “Rocket Man”:
Trump nicknames, ranked (best to worst):
Lyin' Ted
Rocket Man
Little Rocket Man
Little Marco
Sloppy Steve
Crooked Hillary
Sleepy Eyes Chuck Todd
Cryin' Chuck Schumer
Low Energy Jeb
Failing New York Times
Psycho Joe
Liddle Bob Corker
Pocahontas— Olivia Nuzzi (@Olivianuzzi) January 5, 2018
In the hierarchy of Trump nicknames, I think "Sloppy Steve" is superior to "Crooked Hillary" but still not better than "Lyin' Ted."
Thoughts?
— Chris Cillizza (@ChrisCillizza) January 5, 2018
And let’s uh, let’s not forget he’s the President of the United States:
Presidential phrases
FDR: Only thing we have to fear is fear itself
JFK: Ask not what ur country will do for u. Ask what u will do for ur country
Reagan: Mr. Gorbachev, tear down that wall!Trump:
Low-energy Jeb
Liddle Marco
Lyin Ted
Crooked Hillary
Flake the Flake
Sloppy Steve— Ana Navarro-Cárdenas (@ananavarro) January 5, 2018
Plenty of people had almost grudging respect for Donald’s latest punitive nickname:
As much as I hate to admit it, "Sloppy Steve" is branding gold. It's gonna stick.
— Jeff Blehar is *BOX OFFICE POISON* (@EsotericCD) January 5, 2018
Gotta admit, Sloppy Steve is good. He has a real talent for catchy kindergarten insults.
— Helen Kennedy (@HelenKennedy) January 5, 2018
I'm still gonna call Steve Bannon "Sloppy Steve" tho
— Akilah Hughes (@AkilahObviously) January 5, 2018
https://twitter.com/lachlan/status/949126930338582528
https://twitter.com/PalmerReport/status/949139892054900737
https://twitter.com/jbarro/status/949126908834443264
"Sloppy Steve" pic.twitter.com/gYAdgQ9r30
— pourmecoffee (@pourmecoffee) January 5, 2018
I mean I kind of laughed when I saw Sloppy Steve, but I hated myself for it.
— The Darkest Timeline Numbersmuncher (@NumbersMuncher) January 5, 2018
There’s this alternate definition, but for real, click at your own risk.
Of course, some people had fun at Trump’s expense:
https://twitter.com/4everNeverTrump/status/949134219988557824
Hey, Deceitful Donald!
You still awake?
Sloppy Steve is trending.
— Alyssa Milano (@Alyssa_Milano) January 5, 2018
I don’t think Mike Pence is allowed to perform a Sloppy Steve unless Mother is present.
— Brandon Cloud (@theclobra) January 5, 2018
Meanwhile, Kumail Nanjiani had an idea:
https://twitter.com/kumailn/status/949152948990328833
So did Dana Loesch:
Sloppy Steve sounds like a Great Value version of Sloppy Joe.
— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) January 5, 2018
Turns out, they’re half-right:
I straight-up just guessed a vegan recipe for a “Sloppy Steve” would exist and I was right pic.twitter.com/vo9hQ3sHtz
— julia reinstein 🚡 (@juliareinstein) January 5, 2018
But as Rob Reiner reminds us, it’s Bannon’s move now:
Looks like the ball’s in Sloppy Steve’s court.
— Rob Reiner (@robreiner) January 5, 2018