The riding portion of the latest “Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee” had to be cut short after the yellow Ferrari that Jerry Seinfeld had picked out for his guest Amy Schumer started smoking on the streets of New York City.
The sports car showed signs of trouble as soon as the two took off from Schumer’s Upper West Side apartment, with Seinfeld eventually declaring the vehicle a “piece of shit.”
“It’s comforting to know how I’m going to die, I guess,” Schumer said, clutching her broken seatbelt like Rosary beads.
“I really, seriously, don’t know if we’re going to make it,” Seinfeld said. “But, we don’t cancel shows. We do the show and if things go wrong, that’s just the way it is.”
Things did go wrong but the comedians made the best of the situation, abandoning their ride somewhere in the Bronx and traveling on foot to a nearby diner.
When asked what she would compare a car breaking down to in a woman’s life, Schumer predictibly told Seinfeld, “a vagina.”
“How bad can a vagina go wrong?” Seinfeld asked.
As is protocol for a guest of Seinfeld’s web series, Schumer complimented him on his career and renowned TV sitcom.
“Your show is like, ‘The Wire’ of comedy,” Schumer told Seinfeld. He replied, “I’ve never seen ‘The Wire.’
After finally arriving at a restaurant, Seinfeld ordered his coffee and a very specific breakfast of eggs over medium, “with nothing else on the plate.” His waitress then promptly asked, “do you want toast with that?”
“Part of me just wants to go ‘Full Metal Jacket,’” an aggravated Seinfeld said after the server walked away.
Schumer opened up to her comedic elder statesman about her youth, her career and her love life, which she compared to a tsunami of unforeseen disappointment.
“For female comics, it’s hard to date someone,” Schumer said. “It’s usually an issue, what we do.”
Schumer was in a relationship with fellow standup Anthony Jeselnik and also dated professional wrestler Dolph Ziggler. After Seinfeld complimented her on how nice she looked for their day out, Schumer shot him down with her patented self-deprecation.
“There’s a team of people making me look this mediocre,” Schumer said.
Watch the second episode from Season 5 of “Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee” above.